Not everyone's parenting team looks the same. For me, it's me and my husband. That's it. We are alone in Los Angeles and we don't count with anyone else for support, but each other.
Other people may be single parents, and have the support of a family member. While others may have a whole big family's support, or count with hired help. No matter the TYPE of support you have, it is important to HAVE SUPPORT when raising your kids.
Why it's important to have a good team? Whether it is big or small.
- It will make you feel happier & healthier mentally
- It will make things easier on you, which will reduce your stress
- You won't feel lonely, which will reduce the risk of depression
- You will enjoy parenting more
- Your kids will feel safe with a good team raising them
- And they will learn about respectful communication and how to build healthy relationships
So here are my tips of what I think makes a good parenting teamwork:
1. Above all everyone in the team should be willing to help yourself. Know how important daily self care actions are. How you need to find time to be alone. And keep your identity.
2. Make "US TIME" a thing: this way you’re likely to feel closer to your partner (whoever that is) and more supported as a parent. And this can make parenting together more enjoyable. Feeling close and on the same page is a must for us.
3. Divide and conquer: have individual tasks and trust each other with them.
4. If you come across an issue that you can't agree on, understand that both of you want the best for your baby and maybe, that best does not look the same for the both of you. So learn to listen and try to come to meet in the middle. Value the differences too.
5. Be on the same page of top issues. It’s about agreeing on things like bedtimes, nutrition, school choices or discipline. If one of your team members does not agree and does one of these differently, it will make parenting more difficult. For example: If your mom is part of your team and doesn't respect your no salt no sugar choices, it will be hard for her to keep being part of your team, or feeding your baby will get extra challenging.
6. Show you are a team: even from a young age, be mindful of arguing in front of them, how you speak to each other, and back each other up. Even if you don’t agree speak privately later.
7. Be affectionate and loving with each other. We do this so much and with Sofia too. Kisses, hugs, dances... I love how Sofia smiles instantly when we are affectionate and happy. Even on the days we are busy, stopping and doing some love actions is important and takes a second!
I truly don't know what I would do without my husband, we are such a good team, it has surprised me how much better we are as a team now that we are parents and I can't take that for granted. As we both work hard on our businesses and raise Sofia all alone.
Comments